Closing my Eyelids 2 Reality

Life has been quite the wild ride for me lately.  The twists and turns of the constant uphill journey finds me in places I never thought I’d arrive to.  I’ve been working on my career in writing and publishing which is one of my five loves in life.  There is ongoing learning and lots of inspiration all around to keep me marching forward.  Today I saw a deer in the city and she was beautiful.  It reminded me the simpleness that is among us and the peace that transcends when you take the moment to be still and watch.  Life passes us by way too quickly and for most of us, like myself, I forget to breathe.  Well I’ve been absent for far too long here and I will return with updates about the new books and write to keep the audience I have intrigued with what may come next!  Enjoy the day……

Need more Motivation

Beaten up and broken down.  I have over-heated and ran out of gas.  The everyday rituals have burned me up.  I feel tired and I feel old.  My feet hurt from pounding the pavement and I constantly feel like a slave lately to the ways of trying to make ends meet.  I sleep very little for my passion burns inside my head with the ideas for my second book.  I’m on a mission but I need to funds to make my dream come true.  Pulling three jobs is not the “american dream.”  I have all the dedication but the life in me feels like its getting sucked out.  Any ideas on how to self medicate for some motivation, please let me know.

It was a Longer Snooze

Well, my couple of weeks turned into five weeks.  I was burning the candle at both ends and come to realize that my book wasn’t the hard part, it’s promoting it that is very detailed.  I hope I can find someone that will hold my head over the water or over the toliet to help me, so that I may be able to finish the process.  Come by OCTOBER 1st of 2008, my book “A Bittersweet Reflection” will be available to the public for purchase.  You will have the option to purchase it in hardcover, paperback, or a downloaded version to your computer.  As the date fast approaches, I’ll let you know where you can offically buy a copy and direct you to the websites so you can place an order.

This book was a long time in the making and I already have book #2 rattling around in my head.  And Lofter, my friend, you just let me know when you want me to sign your copy! :)   I am definetly back to writing here again.  I’m glad to be back and indulge in the world again at wordpress.

Taking A Snooze

Hey there!  I just wanted those of you that come to my site to read my stuff that I will be taking a little break for I am on my way to finish my up and coming book.  The candle has been buring on both ends which has not given me any time to compile new ideas to put down here.  I should hopefully be back again within 2 weeks.  Take care and Happy Blogging!  Until then, catcalls

Stolen In Darkness

 

Life hasn’t made you complete

You had felt empty inside

Dead within the confines of your own skin

There wasn’t a freedom that you saw

No rhythm amongst the living

None of saw the path of destruction

Of the brokenness within you

A manic depressant is all that you were

Your recklessness grew toward depression

The pain strangled you, choking the epitome of you

You were grasping for your life

Being sucked under

Hands whirling around you like demons fornicating inside you

To you, your life was nothing worth fighting for

You were suffocating your life away

Of you we’ve cried

Misery reigned in your mind

Leaving without incident was appealing to you

As you tied the knot of unrelenting torment

Maneuvering your way through it

Questioning the leap

Your eyelids fell shut to turn the world away

To breathe in the last idea of sanctuary

Before your darkness fell

 

A Fool’s Out-Cry

 

A clamouring impulse

Spontaneous eruption

Swells the adrenaline antidote

Which rages loneliness

Of not being with you

An image of me

Sweeps nothing, provokes nothing

Of any loving thoughts

You may secretly possess

Holds your tongue tight

Words unspoken

Never to whisper

Sentiments you contain

Securing expressions

Behind your lips

Seduction of our kiss

Haunts my dreams

Recreates tensity

Of feelings

Bursting in torment

Driving unruly

Corruptions inside me

Fires of passion

Nowhere to burn

Wanting to flee

To escape this refrain

That sits restless

As time ticks

Maybe I–

Only a wandering fate

Came to focus

Unattempted to pursue

A shadow let slip away

Leaving the door half open

Just a face you observed

Maybe this chaos

Leads to your heart

Urges my stumble

To make sense of all this

There’s no one else

You’re the rarity

I crave

Now I linger your extending hand

Trying to ignore

Feelings you embedded and left unclaimed.

Being Aware Of Your Surrondings

The other day I was talking to a friend of mine about my writing.  I rocked and reeled over her impression, her perception, and her interpretation of all my writings thus far.  You can’t judge an author based on what they write or where they get the inspiration.  Words on a page are simply words.  They can provoke a thought to bring a reader to a different place than they were first heading toward.  As writers, you must know where you’re going with an idea.  You can’t take from anyone else for it wouldn’t be your own.  People have to think out of the box to enjoy the material and as writers we must help them get there.  Readers can read in-between the lines but what they think is usually what it isn’t and the only person you can ask is the author. For myself, I’ve seen a lot in this lifetime.  Experienced things more than most at my age.  I’m far quicker to understand something and to look at it at all angles before I make my assumption.  You must know where you’re at all times; not just physically but emotionally and mentally.  It’s easier to look through your own eyes and write how you’d see it versus someones else’s.   Conversations is probably where the magnitude of most ideas is stimulated.  You can run away with the topic of conversation and be the devil’s advocate on any level.  So keep in mind that not just in living in life is material enough but how you can interpret on a different scale is rich in itself.  So enjoy the works of writers and be amazed whether you like how they write or like what they have to say.  It’s all in the talent in how one uses a pen.

Unquenched Hunger

 

You came into my life

I learned of the person you are

Captivated by your voice

My thoughts blended into yours

I dreamt of your face

Your invisible touch haunted my nerves

My heart wants to know of your love

To touch you, to be close to you

Your warmth makes me complete

The need constantly grows

The hunger is never satisfied

In your eyes,

A thousand words were said

But nothing was never clear

And I am left dizzy

Trying to make sense of it all

Not knowing if I am coming or going

Unsure if it’s me I see in your eyes

Love refreshes the soul

Each day has a glorious tone

Every step is lighter

And darkness never seems that lonely

I reach for you in my sleep

Wanting to hang on

To every moment you are near

Images of us are burned into my memory

One kiss dances upon my lips

My skin is the only thing that keeps me together

You are what I want

I am what you need

But all it takes,

Is for one of us to walk away

To make us seem like

We never existed.

8-23-05

What Love Does

Love constitutes beauty in a world of chaos.  Love is the adhesive that mends broken halves of lost lovers or damaged hearts.  Love has no restrictions.  Love fights for it wants, for what it needs to breathe to have life.  Love is fearless.  It shines through the horrible, the weak, the slow, and the misfortune.  Love brings the union of two best friends, two soul-mates, two siblings that want to remember a life with both of them in it.  Love creates a fantasy, a hope, a faith, or a mournful loss of something that once seemed invincible.  Love is a good deed, a smile, a sweet caress, or a tender word.  Love is everlasting.  Without love, tomorrow would never come and nothing could seem so innocent as a new born child.  Love is always something better, and to never know what it is, or what it means, and what it can stand for; then no one could understand how it makes a chaos world so still.

11-23-98

Life As We Know It

People are creatures of habit.  Most of them get complacent in the everyday routine of life.  Adventure, risk, new experiences make life always more interesting.  It creates stories and memories; without anything new, life as we know it would remain very dull and get very depressing.  Life would fall into a rut and the wheels of motion would just constantly spin and there would be a feeling of no way out.  Whether people are aware of their complacent lifestyle, life then becomes unvalued and invalid.  People, places, things, smells, beauty all get taken for granted.  Then people wonder why people leave their life.  Circumstances can change the course of life but to never know what is in front of you is a tragedy; for you didn’t take the time to look around to see what was worth hanging onto and sometimes what you already have isn’t what you really should have settled for.  There are definitely certainties that we know.  For example, you know when you find true love and you know the feeling of when someone dies.  However, how we choose to live our life is up to us.  From the first breath of life to our last, how we charted our course in life is what made us who we are.  Do we settle for what’s safe?  Or do we take the chance of what could make us happy?  Life as we know it is way too short.  The same chances don’t come around twice.  Oppourtunity strikes when we aren’t ready for it.  I’d rather live outside of what people think I should do and do what’s right for me.  I can’t become complacent nor should anyone else.  Our endeavors stop growing, our senses stop working, our faith falls short, and our happiness stops.  Then before too long when you want to make that change, its too late because you were once afraid and now you don’t think you can.  It’s like a phrase I once heard, “You have to stick your neck out like a turtle before you can move two steps ahead.”